People say I’m inspiring…truth is, this picture is FULL of inspiring people.
My friend Clair. Just lost her teenage daughter in such a cruel way and she was her best friend, Clair was out with us today living life to the fullest 🥰 she is just incredible 😘
My sister Emma. Inspires me with her grit and determination to not let her battle (and winning) against cancer affect her ability to be active outdoors with us ..nothing slows her down! I can’t keep up lol….
Lou for introducing and inspiring us crazy lot to open water swimming…so my close friends Jo, Dani, Dawn and Lou are in the pic.
Lisa is another sober warrior and a woman after my own heart. In water, on mountains, on holidays, in nature…our lives are being lived out in unison and in gratitude even though we have actually only met a few times. I’m glad I met you…
Her troup today were part of her Bee sober community who defy odds to be/try/battle/conquer/aspire to be sober, every day. So even though I’ve only met them today. They inspire me too.
Pete was behind the camera. He helped, navigated, assisted, photographed, fed and watered and still inspired today. He is my rock. And I’m grateful.
So next time people say I’m inspiring…its because of people like this! Thank you ❤️
I’ve not been on here for a while, apologies, I’ve been here living life to the full – which is what I do best 😊 The reason for todays post is my head is so full, it might just explode. So I thought I’d share!
Earlier this week my friend lost her daughter, she was very young and had been though so much tragedy and heartbreak in her short life. She was only a teenager and had Sarcoma. It’s obviously extremely sad she has passed away from cancer, but I cant get out of my head that it was sarcoma that has robbed my friend of her teenage daughter, just like it tried to take my sister!
My friend Clair first brought a young Zara to our run club, Run Together Whitefield and they walked or jogged a little at the back most weeks. Zara was always so very smiley, even the weeks she came in her wheelchair. We would also see her most weeks at parkrun.
Life can be so fucking cruel and I hope Zara is free from all pain and running Parkruns up there and smiling at us lot puffing and panting down here at parkrun.
So, it’s been a very sad week topped by us finding out the sad news that Pete’s stepdad Graham also passed away last night. Very sad news again, Graham was such a lovely man who saw the good in everyone. He absolutely loved visits and adored Pete and Jorja – RIP Graham.
So I’m travelling to Kenmore as I type this to visit my dadas resting place, reflecting a lot! There’s 19 of us (tickles & Co) en route north currently. We are going to remember our dad, and for me celebrate his life and I’ll continue to live life to the full.
Thanks for listening and my head feels slightly less full, so I appreciate all the kind words we have been receiving. Lots of love, hold your loved ones tighter this weekend if you can xxx
Wow! Another year of sobriety under my belt. Another year of living my best life. I do feel the luckiest person in the world. Lucky I could change, lucky I am able to get out and do amazing stuff with amazing people all the time.
I’ve abseiled, canoed, climbed mountains, hiked ultras, bouldering, paddleboarded, open water swam in quays/sea/lakes/reservoirs, I’m smashing my degree, creating groups to get others out moving and well…just living life, every day!
One of the other things I have been though is present. Present for my kids when they needed me, Present for myself recognising when I needed to pause and fully present to enjoy my shiny new life. That’s something I never had before.
Talking about presents…look at what I woke up to 😘 Radley bag and Lady Million, both from Pete. Thoroughly spoilt 😘
Thank you for the support and inspiration. Here’s to another year of my shiny new life! I love it ❤❤❤
Since we last spoke I have walked an ultra-marathon (on Saturday) and reached 1000 days sober (on Sunday) – Yeay! Go me!
Sounds all pretty positive eh? Well Saturday wasn’t so positive, and the disappointment still lingers, I didn’t finish my ultra-marathon, I had to retire from the event on medical grounds – heat exhaustion. Which ironically (because I was so dehydrated) was followed by over 3 hours of tears, big wet and snotty dramatic tears!
We started out at 7.30am and it was already 24 degrees, immediately on a hill and then there was 10km of hills, moors and bog that followed. This 10km took longer than we expected, but we made the first stop at 13km still positive and upbeat. We were very well hydrated as we took 3 litres of water at each rest stop. However, I didn’t really eat much, I felt sick in the heat. This was going to come back and bite me on the arse!
It all started so well….13km Rest stop…still in good spirits!
After 13km we were on flat trails along a river, in a tiny bit of shade. So we got in some km quite quickly considering the heat. Then it got to me, the extreme heat on very little food and 30 degree heat. My pace slowed down dramatically, and I barely made it to the 27km stop without huffing and crying when no-one was watching.
I didn’t want to go back out after this stop, but Pete insisted. I picked myself up, changed clothes, ate a sandwich and off we went again. It was soon evident I had nothing left in the tank with the heat and lack of food. It was mike and Pete and the videos, messages and love from people on social media that got me to the 37km stop. Before we walked into the rest stop I immediately asked the lady what do I do to retire, my mind was made up and even Pete and Mike knew if I had carried on it would be 2am when we finished. If they went without me they could be in by midnight.
So after re-fueling off they went reluctantly leaving me behind and I broke my heart watching them go without me! I felt guilty on them as I slowed them so much throughout the day, I felt guilty on the people who had sponsored us almost £2,300 ….I thought about my sister and friend who had had Sarcoma (our charity we were raining funds for) and been through so much…..and also, I was just downright disappointed in myself!
My heroes going off to finish the last 13km without me! x
I was taken back to the start and looked after by all the staff whilst waiting for Pete and Mike to finish, I didn’t have to wait very long. They actually ran most of the last 13km despite them being broken when they left me at 37km. Just Incredible! I’m so proud of them.
The next day, when I was less emotional, I realised I was incredibly proud of myself getting to 37km in the toughest conditions I’ve ever done an event. I was proud for setting off, I was proud for having the grit and determination to reach 37km and I was proud that my body and mind was capable of all of this.
I was also extremely proud to be 1,000 days sober. My life has changed dramatically in 1,000 days and everyday I’m grateful for this!
Thank you to everyone for the support on helping to raise funds, kind words throughout all the crying on social media and to Mike and Pete for supporting me and being just hero’s’ by finishing their ultra in such a spectacular way!
Well this week has been a bit naff and I’ve been rather grumpy. 5 days ago I was pinged by the NHS Covid app to advise I had to self isolate for the next 5 days (it would have been 10 days but the day in question was 5 days prior)
I’m doing 2 ultra challenges in the next 6 weeks and really could not afford to lose 5 days training. However, once I stopped being a baby I realised there’s worse things to happen. I could still exercise in the house and I still have 2 weeks until the first event.
So I’m free to go outside tomorrow and I’m literally out hiking the hills for the next 8 days, then I’ll do a couple of shorter hikes the week before the event in the lake district.
So today I got up stupidly early, did a 3000 step challenge workout, yoga, wim hof breathing exercises, acupressure mat session and spent the rest of the day in the garden reading a whole book. Ate good food with very little crap, which is a miracle for me. A proper self care day. Maybe….I needed to chill a little and look after me a bit before cracking on with more training. Maybe I needed to refocus. I think its worked.
Self care 😍
The book I read today was written by my friend who is a new author Irene Wignall. Honestly both her books are bloody brilliant. Easy reading, relatable (in the sense of crazy shit going on) and so bloody funny. Plus she is sober and very inspirational 😍
Irene, it came this morning, I’ve just finished it and I bloody bloody loved it 🙌🙌🙌 (if you fancy seeing what the fuss is about, website is below)
I bloody loved doing this Instagram live tonight with Soberfish. I’ve followed Dawn on Instagram and Facebook and her blog since before I was sober. So she has been a massive part of my sober journey. So tonight to talk about my story with her was wonderful.
5 Years today since my Dad died. Seems like a lifetime ago, but also like yesterday – weird. The trauma of those last days will possibly never leave me but over the years it fades a little more and I remember more of the good stuff. And there was so much of it. I had a very good childhood and lots of fond memories of my dad. I wont ever forget that 🥰
I went walking with a lovely friend today who asked me about my dad and how I was feeling about today. I explained that my dad was very ‘stop moaning and get on with it’ …it used to drive me crazy at the time, but now I 100% agree with this ethos.
Since he died, in those earlier years, I was very ‘woe is me’ whilst drowning in wine. Today was very different…I got out and did something, something beautiful and worthwhile and exhilarating. I lived life …and got on with it. But still remembering him. I suppose climbing those hills today made me closer
We saw the most beautiful Robin on the way back to the car. I think that was Dad approving of me ‘getting on with life’ and grasping it with both hands.
This week was such a better week. I MADE time to walk each day, I did exercise on zoom, I had early nights. I also had my B12, full blood screen, restarted all my vitamins and supplements and booked some healthcare appointments to help with my aches and pains. I put myself and my sanity first and slotted work and uni around that.
I need to remember for the 2 years of this degree that I need to do this! What I did this week and NOT what I did on week 1.
What have I changed? Less social media and scrolling More walking and exercise Plot time in, instead of winging it Earlier nights Getting up early Daily headspace and insight meditation Made a chiropractor appointment Vitamins and supplements
What else? I’ll continue with the above as its worked. But if I struggle again I’ll switch it up. Because I don’t want that ‘drowning’ feeling from week 1.
In all of this being a new student, crazy work demands and a global pandemic….im sure glad I’m sober. Im glad I don’t need alcohol to ‘cope’ or function (which is funny, alcohol does the complete opposite) in ‘place’ of alcohol I sit and think and come up with a plan to deal with it.
I hope you are having a lovely Sunday. I’m sat chilling on the couch and will go out and get my free outdoor therapy fix and do some studying later. All is good.
If my post inspires you to do something a smidge positive to make your week better, let me know – stay safe x
Wow hasn’t it been crazy! I’ve literally burnt out from the last 6 weeks of constant 12 hour days. I didn’t have a break over Christmas so have only had a couple of days off in weeks. I work for the NHS so have been busy buying everything to build vaccination clinics from scratch whilst managing a team who are doing the everyday pandemic plus business as usual buying. As well as work being crazy I started an apprenticeship degree and Management in Health and Social Care this week. I know, why would I do this? But ….its something I’ve fancied for a while and we were mid ‘waves’ when I actually signed up. Not in wave 3 lockdown craziness.
So last week I worked a million hours, plus 2 days of university and no exercise. This was the worst part, the no exercise. I literally do something exercise wise every day usually. Even if its a couple of km dog walk, clubbercise by zoom or Pilates. So to do nothing for a week I was really struggling, Mentally and physically. It made me realise that not only was I struggling with a manic week, but I realised this lockdown was different. I haven’t struggled with the pandemic at all until now, I’ve been my ‘ray of sunshine’ self all along and probably put this down to copious amounts of self care, daily exercise and positive outlook. (I do realise how lucky I have been to be unscathed up until now)
Anyway, tough week, I’ve said. So yesterday we got out in the middle of no-where (locally) and every so often I stopped to look around and wonder at the beauty of the thick untouched snow on the hills for miles around. It was stunning, glistening and silent. I honest to god felt like all of my stress and worries and tense shoulders had melted away on those hills. Seriously, it was like therapy! Free therapy.
Today I continued with the therapy and took myself off to the snow covered hills again, alone with my highly motivating audio book (Mel Robbins – 5 second rule) and again it was wonderful to be out. Listening to Mel made me re-focus on what I’m going to do differently this week coming up to make my week easier.
Not press snooze – I procrastinate and press snooze endless times each day, I’m wasting the day!
Have some ‘social media free’ time – I scroll for endless amounts of hours each day, I could save myself a whole host of time (and some negativity) if I stop bloody scrolling
The Uni days are going to be Uni days and work days work days – this week I had 2 laptops open on Tuesday and Wednesday, I didn’t know whether I was coming or going, or which hat I was wearing.
I’m getting out every day, regardless of the business of the day, the weather or my ‘cantbearsedness’ I’m doing this!
Anyway I thought I’d share that even positive pants people have off periods and also, I wanted to be accountable for the improvements I’m going to make next week. I’ll have to do it now I’ve written it Ha!
Have a good week and I’ll pop back next week to update you in the progress…..
All Shiny and New - Sue Tickle 
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